I Can Sing Again

October 3, 2008 at 4:44 am Leave a comment

Dr. Anderson, the oncologist, told us today, “The fluid inside the mass is dead blood.”  As he examined the mass, he smiled and said to Dan, “The area that was aspirated is soft. It is not holding fluid. Feel it.”  Dan looked surprised, but very pleased realizing that new fluid was not being trapped there.  (However, fluid is filling a small mass in his upper right thigh.)

Because the aspiration test found no cancer cells in the mass, Dr. Elieson, the surgeon, has agreed to study all of Dan’s C-T Scans, MRIs, all test results.  He will meet with us next week, Tuesday, Oct. 7, to explore the possibility of surgically “cleaning out the mass.”  Our mood is UP!  

We are so human!  The doctor’s harsh words said to help us face “reality,” pushed us into deep sadness, fear, anger yesterday.  Today, Dr. Anderson”s and Dr. Elieson’s words lifted our spirits.  Words… what’s that about that we choose to let words control our feelings???  Being submissive, trusting God in the midst of pain and fear, saying, “Your will be done, Lord,” is not easy. That’s a “faith walk.” 

Except for yesterday when I let the doctor’s words upset me, I’ve discovered myself singing the last few days as I go about my work.  What’s behind that ?   I have hope!  I let go of the fear…the fear that said, “Dan is not going to live.  Without Dan, I will not be alright.”  You see, that was a lie. Whether we live or die, Dan will be alright. I will be alright. Because we are in Jesus, God’s grace covers us, helps us.

Behind most fear is a lie…the lie, “I am not going to be alright.”  Who is behind all lies?  John 8:44 tells us, “Satan…is a liar, and the father of lies.” In I John 4:18, John explains “…perfect love drives out fear.”  Perfect love comes only from God.  It is our prayer that we all choose to walk hand in hand with God so His love will keep us free from fear. — Anne and Dan

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Entry filed under: Cancer's Dark Valley.

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