Archive for April 19, 2009

Wavering Trust

Tonight I asked the Lord for a scripture that I can share with you that will help me too.  My trust is wavering; I’m afraid…Dan’s swelling is getting worse; Dan’s heart rate (pulse) has been in the 90’s for 3 days, and he has fever every evening.  Now, at bedtime, his pulse measured 100, and his temp is 100.5 F.  He is still coughing even though his lungs are clear.

Dan asked me to look up the side effects of Neurontin – started when the new diuretics were prescribed.  Well, swelling in the lower part of the body, and muscle weakness are two of the side effects!  Why did I not look that up when I explored the other two meds???  Years ago, my Dr. gave me Neurontin for awhile with no problems.  We thought we’d found the problem when we read that both diuretics were sulfa based.  We did not look further.  Dan stopped the Neurontin tonight.

All my brave talk about whatever happens we will be okay…that fact is still true.  But I’m seeing that it is not okay with me for Dan to suffer so badly. I see that I’m afraid that the continuing problems he has may create serious health problems even if God heals the cancer.  Dan is concerned about what is happening.  Neither one of us is ready to let him go Home. I will call the doctor again.   I will also talk to the pharmacist to 1. tell him he did not pay attention to Dan’s allergy to sulfa.  2. Ask him if he will please look at the meds Dan is taking to see if the combination of drugs is causing his heart to beat so fast.

So what Scripture did God give me…again?  Matthew 8:26 – 27, “He replied, ‘You of little faith, why are you so afraid?’  Then he got up and rebuked the winds and the waves, and it was completely calm.  The men were afraid and asked, “What kind of man is this?  Even the winds and the waves obey Him!”  Jesus, forgive me for not trusting you. Our path is long, full of thorns and rocks. I feel like we are being shot at often by a sniper.  Please, cover us with your wings, O Lord of all.  In Jesus name, Amen. — Anne and Dan

April 19, 2009 at 6:39 am 1 comment


April 2009