I Refused to Think about Change

Once upon a time, an acorn fell to the ground on my mountain.

When we were “young marrieds,” Dan wanted to talk about what life insurance he should buy.  Just the thought of being without him upset me, brought tears to my eyes.  Being young and foolish, I refused to talk about life insurance.  Dan brought the subject up several times over the next few years explaining that it was for my protection, so that I’d have income in case something happened to him.  Finally, I tearfully agreed, and, yes, we bought life insurance for Dan.  Now, I’m thankful we did.

But it is more painful than I had imagined to be without Dan.  Some days I feel more like a robot than a live person. Other days, I feel totally alive. I don’t know how one prepares for such a major change in life.  And, I really don’t know how one manages such a challenge if they do not have a close walk with Jesus.

My dear friends at the Let’s Start Talking headquarters sent me this birthday card last week…on my 75th birthday:

“Life is change…this much we know.

We plant a seed, we watch it grow.

A caterpillar, small and shy, unfurls into a butterfly.

An acorn falls so it can be transformed into a sturdy tree.

And so we know when change arrives across the landscape of our lives,

We still can trust that it will mean a special blessing not yet seen.”

— author unknown

I feel like the acorn that is decaying in the soil, and beginning to have that first little growth God intends.  —  Anne

In Memory of Mike Real

Mike Real, beloved husband of Bonny Boyd Real, father of Heather and Matt, grandfather of 4 precious children, our brother in law, went Home this morning. (Bonny is Dan’s youngest sister.) Mike was a life long resident of Hobart, Oklahoma.  Following major heart attacks almost 13 years ago, the doctors told him that he had only 5 more years to live.  Yet he lived far beyond their expectations…lived to be a partner to help Bonny in so many ways, to mentor his children, and grandchildren.

A quiet man, Mike was a true friend.  He grew to where he walked closely with the Lord.  Please, pray that God will comfort all those who are grieving their loss.  We are happy for Mike, now well, strong, there with Dan…and God.   I think if we could ask Mike or Dan, they’d say that the words to this centuries old song carries a sweet message that expresses their feelings and their wishes for us today, —

“Be Still, My Soul”

“1. Be still, my soul; the Lord is on thy side;

Bear patiently the cross of grief or pain;

Leave to thy God to order and provide;
In every change He faithful will remain.
Be still, my soul; thy best, thy heavenly, Friend
Through thorny ways leads to a joyful end.

2. Be still, my soul; thy God doth undertake
To guide the future as He has the past.
Thy hope, thy confidence, let nothing shake;
All now mysterious shall be bright at last.
Be still, my soul; the waves and winds still know
His voice who ruled them while He dwelt below.

3. Be still, my soul, though dearest friends depart
And all is darkened in the vale of tears;
Then shalt thou better know His love, His heart,
Who comes to soothe thy sorrows and thy fears.
Be still, my soul; thy Jesus can repay
From His own fulness all He takes away.

4. Be still, my soul; the hour is hastening on
When we shall be forever with the Lord,
When disappointment, grief, and fear are gone,
Sorrow forgot, love’s purest joys restored.
Be still, my soul; when change and tears are past,
All safe and blessed we shall meet at last.”

Hymn #651, The Lutheran Hymnal, Text: Psalm 46:10
Author: Catharine Amalia Dorothea von Schlegel, 1752,
Translated by: Jane Borthwick, 1855
Titled: “Stille, mein Wille”
Composer: Jean Sibelius, b. 1865, arr. Tune: “Finlandia”

May we take those encouraging words to heart…and be comforted.  — Anne

New Looks

At last, curtains are on the kitchen windows! Before I went to Spain, I cut my own hair to what I considered quite short . : > )

Roses grace the valance and the bottom curtain. During the day, the curtains are open to let the light in.

While on a mission in Spain, the hair stylist "trimmed" my hair to what she called "normal" length.

I’m still learning about how things are done in other countries!  “But He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” 2 Corinthians 12:9

Blessings,  Anne

Retreating from the Pain

Suddenly, seeing Dan’s photos was too painful.  Opening the closet door where his coat still hangs was more than I could bear…and I began to shut down, retreat from the world and my feelings.  However, I knew to reach out for help.  A therapy session (on Skype) with a woman, trained in the deep healing therapy that I use, began to pull me out of it.  God will see me through this.

The first week in December, I was in Spain with Tim and Claudia and their family.  I am happy to announce that while there, we established the Spanish Branch of God’s Children.  They have collect many good, warm used clothes that will soon be going to the Covasna County Red Cross. One of their children is heading up a campaign at her school to collect sturdy shoes to send to the children.  The other child is going to head up a drive to collect good toys to ship to the children. Also, one of the local banks has agreed to put a “change box” in their foyer for people to donate their change to help the children and elderly in Romania living in poverty.

Charter members of the Spanish Branch of God's Children will spread the news how Spanish people can help the needy in Romania!

Thousands of empty condos are silent witnesses to the economic crisis in the world. They line the Mediterranean that you see in the distance. Yet, people in Spain are going to help the children and elderly of Romania!

I never imagined I'd be on Costa del Sol looking across the Mediterranean to North Africa. God is full of surprises!!!

“…it is God which works in you both to will and to do of His good pleasure.”  Phillipians 2:13  — Anne